Friday, May 9, 2014

More on the mistreatment of LGBT Community Members

It was brought to my attention that in my last post I did not go into this beyond my own experiences. While my own mistreatment by my family is a good example let's look further.

Many, if not most, people are raised to believe that being anything except "straight" is "bad" or "wrong" or even "evil" or "sick". Personally I believe this is where the mistreatment begins. Parents give their child the idea that they are these things if they do not like the "right" gender or just the one, opposite, gender.  I am sure most of us in the Community knows how damaging this is to a child's self-image. Parents who do not discuss "right" gender attention, or even gender associate (such as "boy" colors vs "girl" colors) find they tend to have much healthier (mentally and emotionally) children.  It starts very young.  A parent that tells their son not to play with dolls or tell their daughter not to play with cars or super heroes is telling their child that what they like is wrong. This leads to children wondering what is "right" about themselves.  This sets the child up to be uncertain in anything they are left to decide on their own. They then tend to let others tell them what is the "right" thing to do. That is how peer pressure was invented. By the first parent that told their child what they liked was wrong leading to the child not knowing what to like. Because different families can have different values this leaves the child open to doing the "wrong" thing. Wrong to the parent and sometimes the law.

As a LGBT youth grows up they either suppress who they are to where they really don't know anymore, or they pretend which leads to the hurting of others. It can also lead to them bullying those that are far more comfortable with themselves. A self-hate which they project onto others to ease their own confused pain. Parents must learn to be more accepting otherwise this cycle will never end.

On the same line of thinking, parents of straight children who teach their children that being LGBT is the above mentioned things set them up to ostracize their peers for being who they were born to be. The torment experienced in late elementary, middle, and high school can be as simple as name calling to property destruction to as severe as physical harm or even death. Be it at the hands of the other children or themselves.

As adults those brought up to hate or fear the Community tend to write laws that are unfair, continue the name calling, harassing and even worse. When I say worse I mean cornering a gay man in an alleyway and beating him to death. Or raping a lesbian to "teach her to love it". "It" being sex with a man instead of a woman.  Though very rarely reported there have been gay men raped by angry women who are trying to "fix" them.  There is nothing to fix, for we are not broken. There is nothing more wrong with us than straights. We all suffer the same illnesses, the same daily struggles with finances and worries. We all just want to be loved and accepted.  In countries outside the US they are passing laws to make genocide of the LGBTs in THEIR countries legal. Anyone caught being LGBT is labeled a criminal. Not that long ago gays in the US were labeled criminals for acts performed withing their OWN homes. They were sent to jail if there was proof they were having physical relations with their partners. It did not matter that both were consenting adults. It was "wrong" so they had to be punished.

Religious people will be quick to point out in the Old Testament it is said that it is a sin to lay with man as with woman.  Yet, in the entire Bible there are more references to the sin of Divorce than that of being gay. It was pointed out to me that Solomon and David (I believe) were blessed in their union by God.  If anyone knows this reference please share it.

People are tormented, tortured and killed daily just for loving people. It should not matter if they are Black, White, Hispanic, Asian, Straight, Bisexual, Gay, Lesbian, Transsexual, Cross-dressers, or whatever. What should matter is that they love instead of hate.

My dear readers, please. Teach love and acceptance. Not hate and fear.

Thursday, May 8, 2014

Mistreatment, Mental Health, and the LGBT Community

My name is Kat, I am Bisexual, and I suffer from Mental Illness. I grew up in a house of abuse. I married and left an abusive man.  I am one of many faces of the ill, poorly treated LGBT community.  For many of us it begins with family. For others it begins with those they thought were friends. For still many more, it begins with strangers. The question is why? The answer is far from simple.

Straight people expect everyone to be supportive of them in their darkest hour, yet many of them turn on their LGBT friends when they come out to them, in need of love, support and understanding. We are wounded the worst when we are at our most vulnerable. It is hypocritical. It is hateful. It is the worst nightmare anyone could have.  When I came out on this blog, my mother read it and that was how she found out. To be honest I had no intention of ever telling my parents because I knew what they think and feel about being gay or bisexual.  My mother actually asked if I hated them. If I had wrote it to get more readers. When it came up during the outing of one of my guys being a cross-dresser...I should have known not to tell her but she had asked what kind of things he likes.  She had the nerve to ask me why it didn't make me sick! When I told her: Well, you know how I am. She replied that yes, she knew but we don't talk about it. As if it were a dirty secret that should be kept from everyone. She has accused him of being gay. She asked if he was also bisexual. I said no firmly, but that was a lie. I could not tell her the truth. I know she would have made him leave.

I need him and he needs me. We fulfill each other and comfort each other in was our families never have. Why would I risk that? I had already risked enough telling her he enjoys dressing like a girl.

I suffer from Bipolar Disorder, Borderline Personality Disorder, Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (syndrome? I can never remember) and Major Depressive Disorder.  I often feel empty and alone, but my sweet mate always keeps me from falling over the edge into the dark abyss. Why is it that people like me can usually only find solace in the arms of another LGBT? Even my best friend is a bit questioning. At one time she had an online girlfriend. I supported her, but she was lost and grabbing onto people as lifelines. Not the right reason to have a relationship.  I am so very happy she has found herself a good man (there are good women too, not to say there aren't).  Everyone needs someone that truly loves them. Especially when they cannot love themselves.

My dear readers, if you know someone who is suffering from Mental Illness, whether they are straight, gay, bi, whatever. Hug them. Tell them you care. It could make the difference between choosing to live or letting go of life.

Tuesday, May 6, 2014

Best Crafts: Sent and Received

Good morning my wonderful readers!  This post is part of a swap I am doing for swap-bot .  One of my partners has requested that I write and share about the best craft I ever made/gave and received.  She requested I post photos. This is going to be fun!

First the best I ever made. I have done a lot over the years.  Sadly I did not get photos of everything,so some are lost to me forever. However I do have some photos.

This is Blizzard. I custom made him from a Mountain Brothers My Little Pony from the 80s.  I first washed his mane and tail. Combed them and braided them to help not get the hair into the paint.  When I began his design I had planned on using silver for the snow and gold for his body color, however,that just looked gaudy when I tested the scheme on paper. I ended up with Black and White. I think the overall effect is heartwarming.  I actually sold this piece on Ebay to a collector who had a very nice MLP collection.

Now for the best craft I ever received.  I took part in a pay it forward game on ATCsforall and I got this lovely ATC from Belinda S. From Pennsylvania. Isn't it just lovely?

I adore Unicorns and I have to say this is the best one I have ever been given. I have never tried this style,but I am thinking of cultivating some of the strokes and lines used here. Making ATCs and trading them is a lot of fun and I hope more people try it out. There are so many styles and types of ATCs that anyone can do it.

Well, that is all I can think of to say about these. I hope you enjoyed the post my readers. Until my next writing, be creative <3