Wednesday, January 15, 2014

A Great Disappointment for this Bisexual

For those who have read my blog before, you may remember my coming out a few months ago. I am 31 years old and only recently admitted, outside of my imagination, that I am in fact attracted to both men and women. I found a Gay-Straight Alliance to join, and that makes me happy.  I read Camp Kansas City every chance I get.  I was enjoying the feeling of being in a LGBT friendly community. Until crass, careless jokes about being Gay or Lesbian were uttered at a  table only a few feet away from me.  In my first class last semester, I had depicted Penn Valley as open-minded and welcoming because that was what I had felt when I visited during Ally Week.  These three men sat cracking jokes and laughing their heads off. I wanted so much to stand up and say something, but my throat contracted with tears and I found myself rushing off for the solace of one of the campus' restrooms.  After calming down I saw the men had gone from the cafeteria.  So, I chose to vent to you, my readers.  I do not understand how, so close to the obtainment of Civil Rights to all, we can still have biases and hateful. How can we claim to be a true melting pot of the world if we hate people for their gender, sexual preference, religion or other things that should be so easy to accept in a, "Oh you're ______? That's neat! I'm __________!" kind of way.

I am furthered saddened to know that racism is still raging through our once great nation. Yes, once great, but no longer, in my eyes.  How can we be great if our president speaks down about us to foreign countries? If we still rally against Marriage Equality?  If we still see a person's skin color, eye orientation, or accent and judge them before we even know them.  I understand caution but to condemn all for actions by a small sanction of their race, religion, creed, or whatever, is just wrong.  Why can I see it, but not everyone else?  I wrote an essay on how it is where I am from.  I felt it gave me a great opening to show how different every single town of our country can be.  In Richland, Washington, I was seen as an equal, a friend, a playmate (I was young then). In Belton, MO, I was invisible except to the police woman I met when I got lost.  In Kansas City, MO I found myself a victim of hate. Just because I am "White".  I'm sorry, I am not a color. I am a Human Being. As are all of you, my fine readers.  We all deserve to be treated with respect and to be given a chance to show our true selves to others and then be judged.  If you meat me, get to know me and find my ideals clash with yours, we should be able to accept our differences and move on.

It SHOULD be that simple.  I fear for my children and dread the future they may face as adults. Will it STILL be full of hate or will those in the movements for equality and acceptance have won their arguments? Only time will tell.

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