Tuesday, April 24, 2012

Thoughts On The Damage Of Racial Hate

I will never understand why our world is so focused on color. Color of your clothes, the color of your eyes, the color of your very skin. I grew up in a city with many people of various racial backgrounds. I had friends of many of these backgrounds. I also grew up with racism. My father can be a very angry man. When angry he seems to first look at your skin, then gender. At least he used to. These days he is too ill to hate anyone. I once worked in a thrift shop when I was 17. I came to care for a very kind and caring man there. My parents threatened to disown me and throw me out on the streets if I had anything to do with him beyond working with him. He was an African American. I never saw the color of his skin. I saw how his eyes lit up when he assisted a young mother and her children. Or when he helped an older couple. I still remember his bright smile and the way he would look at me sometimes. I do not remember his name. In high school I knew a boy named Bobby, he too was African American. I had kept him a secret letting my parents think he was a white boy. I did not do it from shame of him, but rather out of love, because I knew what my parents would say even then. My parents were not needed to destroy that relationship. The other children in the school did the damage. He received calls threatening harm on him and calling him horrid names because of me. We broke up. We barely spoke after that. So many are angry because of skin color. Because of past hates and wrongings. No one seems able to let it go. In some shape or form it lingers like the stink of rotting fish. In high school I felt the hate. Every where it suffocated possible happinesses. My youth was full of hate. There was little real happiness. My parents wanted me to be with a white boy. Yet none they deemed suitable saw me. I was that thing that was friends with the ... I refuse to use the words. They are filth in my mouth that lingers never to be removed. I did not find anyone that cared for me as myself until I left my parents home. He is white, but I did not see that, I saw only that he was good to me and others. He was giving and compassionate. He is now my husband of ten years. We have 3 children, 2 of which are girls. My husband is like me, he does not see the color of a person's skin as a determining factor of their worth. He sees who they are and how they treat others. So, when our girls are old enough to date we will welcome any boy they bring to meet us. Regardless of skin color or racial background. Any man will be worthy of them if he is good, and gentle. If he is anything like their father he is welcome in our family. Never will we refer to him as any of the racial slurs we heard growing up. Never will our grandchildren be called by the foul names made up for children of mixed heritage. I laugh at that term: Mixed Heritage. It is a mockery to life. No one anywhere is pure anything. I know, I have Italian, German and Polish in my veins. My husband knows of Irish and Italian. We may be white but we are not pure anything. Our children are proud of their heritage. And we will be proud of our grandchildren's heritage. Whatever it may be. Because hate only creates more hate. Hate is the root of all wars, large and small. Be brave my reader and smother the hate. Spread only friendship and love, for only these will save our war-torn world from itself.

Rabbits are not disposable Easter gifts!

 Each year at Easter many  well meaning people go out and get cute baby rabbits to give their kids. However very few take the time to learn about the  breed of rabbit they are getting.  f you adopt, adopt adults so you know how large they are, or prepare for an unknown or mixed breed to  turn out large.  It is better to have a small rabbit with a luxurious, large cage than to have a swiftly growing soon to be huge rabbit in a tiny cage. You can learn more about the various breeds and their sizes  at the ARBA's website here.

A great Resource for people wanting rabbits purely as pets is the House Rabbit Society.  However, if you wish rabbits to be show animals or meat animals, I recommend investing in a membership with the ARBA.

When seeking rabbits, consider first and foremost, is it just a pet? Does breed matter? Does size matter? If you just want a pet then you need to know if you want a purebred of a certain type, you must also consider if color matters.  There are over 30 colors in rabbits. Amazing, huh? In order to properly care for a rabbit for its entire life you need to make sure you have an adequate sized cage from the very beginning, with mixed breeds this can be difficult to be sure of so you may end up having to swap for a larger cage down the road.  In my experience and personal opinion it is best to go with the largest you can find and have a lot of room than to not go large enough and have an unhappy, crowded pet.

Beyond this basic advice I must say READ, read as much as you can about rabbit care as you possibly can BEFORE you bring one home. This way you are les likely to give them up later.  Here are a few rabbits I have found that are needing new homes:

Richie the Rabbit in California

Sugar in North Dakota

Finklestein in Texas

Coco in Missouri

Bonnie in Rhode Island

Sterling in West Virginia


Momo in Florida

According to Petfinder.com there are at least 4,793 rabbits available for adoption.  This is very sad indeed since rabbits are among the top ten most popular pets in the US.  I feel awful knowing there are any living beings in the world in need of good homes.  If I were able I would take in every cat and rabbit I could find and care for them indefinitely, until a good home could be found. Always with the option to bring them back anytime, no questions asked. Sadly I face the reality that I can not do that at this point in time. Though it is certainly a hope for the future.

In conclusion, I hope you will find it in your hearts to adopt before going to a breeder.  Especially if you just want a pet.

Saturday, April 21, 2012


"Regret for the things we did can be tempered by  time; it is  regret for the things we did not do that is inconsolable."   Sydney J. Harris

Ah, regret. The bittersweet twist of yesterday cast on today and shadowing tomorrow. Everyone has at least one regret. My own being many. Some I can never share because they would affect my here and now and never change anything for the better.   One regret I can share is that I should have gone to college when I had a chance and not moved out to live with someone who at the time  turned out to be a bad influence. However, had I not moved in with this person I never would have met my husband or had my sweet children.

So while we all have regrets, I think it's best to dwell only on those we can change. At this point in time I can not attend college, but one day...perhaps.

Wednesday, April 18, 2012

Quote to Ponder

Men are born to succeed, not to fail. ~Henry David Thoreau

This tells me most folks just do not put enough effort into  the things they do where they fail. Those who succeed once and fail thereafter thought  it would be easier once they had achieved success that one time.  Those who fail over and over and over again finally succeeding should be proud. The only TRUE failure is giving  up.

Diagnosed Bipolar Non-Specific Disorder

It's intriguing  that what I thought was normal for all of these  years is actually a disorder. An illness  that I can get help for. Caused by a breakdown in the brain.  Amazing.  I am on my third medicine that they have offered to see if it will help. With this disorder one may have to go through many medicines before finding what works to help them control the effects of the disease.  I tried Abilify, but I could not take having more hallucinations than before and after collapsing we decided to try another. Next came Tegritol, but that suppressed my blood cell production and increased my manic episodes. So now I am on Seroquel.  Last night it knocked me out only 2.5 hours after taking it.  That put me asleep at 8:30.  i was not able to get up the next day until 8:30  am. That is a 12 hour knock out.  Tonight I took it at a little before 8pm.  i am hoping it won't be as bad this time.